Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Turn Off the "Light" of Terror!

Michelle Malkin passes on some INCREDIBLE news! Some Muslim ladies have been CAUGHT by police near an airport...with a flashlight!!!

I was stunned when I read this news, and had to catch my breath. I watched television for a while and drank a tallboy, and am now OK. It gets worse, though, because Michelle tells us about the other Muslim implements of Terror: "The women had digital camera memory cards, binoculars, a flashlight and several lighters on them."

Digital camera memory cards! This is a very unusual item, and I think it is Very Important that they had these!

Awaken, John Doe! Arise from your slumber! The Muslims are purchasing digital camera components!

Why would anyone in this day and age have storage implements for digital photos except to ATTACK AMERICA?!?!

Looks like Team John Doe has some work to do! Together, we must discover where Global Islam is securing its cigarette lighters and flashlights and digital memory cards. Once we isolate the source, we can SHUT IT DOWN! And then NO MORE flashlights for Islam!!!

Thank you for leading the way, Michelle! Remember, everyone: It is only by CONSTANT PANIC that we SHOW OUR STRENGTH!

LATER EMAIL:

Michelle,

Good catch for John Doe, leading police to some Muslims with a flashlight and some cigarette lighters. I'm still worried, though, because what if they were just using the flashlight and cigarette lighters to get us used to seeing Muslims with common household implements? And then, once we're used to it, they just get their hands on more and more stuff like that: pencil sharpeners and lint removers and clothespins and you name it! And it's already too late, because we're like the frog in the pot of boiling water, and we don't even notice anymore! And then, BAM!, global caliphate!

Keep up the good work. It's a tough job to fill Winston Churchill's shoes, but Western Civilization must be saved.

-chris

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